purposely alive.

Be there for others, but never leave yourself behind.

| Dodinsky |


It always happens in the same way.

First, a discomfort.

Last night it was being in the grocery store with no meals planned and the hanger rising. (I've been known to become quite hangry on occasion...) The night before it was walking back from the bar, alone, feeling anxious and hyperaware of my surroundings. A few days before that it was struggling in and out of too many pairs of pants in a stuffy fitting room, none fitting right at all.

Then, a noticing.

Something off. Something not fitting quite right. Something to disrupt the balance in my body and causing a crying out. Hunger. Fear. Overstimulation.  

Next, some validation.

Okay. This is okay. It's okay to feel things. It's okay to exist. This anxiety, this sensation, all of it -- yes, it's here. It's coming up for air and doesn't want to be stuffed down. Okay. This is okay.

Then, a checking in.

What are these feelings? What are they saying? Where do I feel them in my body? Maybe it's a tightness in my throat or a burning in my belly. I stop, slow down, breathe.  What do I need? I pull my cart over in the bakery section where no one else is shopping and feel my hands on the handle, breathe into my legs for a bit. I stop on the sidewalk where I notice a feather in the streetlight and snap a picture. I put the pants away and decide I'm done shopping for the day. 

 

It's become second nature, this checking in for support. Cyclical, daily, over and over, minute by minute -- asking myself what I need. I used to not let myself do this, after I learned it was even possible (for there were many years when I was blind to this level of care). I still often need to remind myself that this is okay, that this is what I need to exist, and that it's okay to exist. 

It's okay to exist.

And so I continue to check in. My body, my deepest source of wisdom, clueing me in. I have all that I need. 

When we can be kind enough to ourselves to listen to what we need on an extremely nuanced level, we can provide ourselves with a level of support that is deeply satisfying and revolutionary. 


Want to join me in learning to access support in ways that feel good and deep and connected? 

We start February 15th. I'm so excited for this one.

And! For 48 hours only, sign up and bring a friend for free! That's right, two for the price of one. Through Friday, February 5th.



If you've been thinking about joining, now is a great time! Just add your friend's email in the Notes to Seller when checking out.